30 July 2014

Fighting Fire With Fire

Don't do it. No matter how tempting it is, just don't do it. 

I've always told myself to stay away from conflict, stay calm and don't let people get to me. Ever since I was little, my parents have told me to take the high road and don't argue back; just walk away. In general, I've managed this. I hate conflict and, even though I can be insanely stubborn, I usually try to make myself admit my mistakes and apologise before stuff gets out of hand. It can be tough but I'd much rather just apologise than lose a friend. However, recently, I messed up and fought fire with fire when I really should have taken a step back and thought about everything for a while. It wasn't smart and it's really made me realise that retaliating is rarely the best idea. In my case, it was huge mistake and has probably left some real damage on both sides. Please learn from my mistakes.

When someone is insulting you, it's incredibly easy to fight back and give them everything you've got. It becomes a sort of competition where each person is trying to out-do the other with every insult and remark, and before long, it gets out of hand. Once it gets out of hand, it's a lot harder to undo. Think about it; you wouldn't try to put out a fire by adding more fuel, right? It would just grow when what you should actually be focusing on is putting it out. Arguments are the same; by fighting back, it's only going to grow. I know that it's much easier said than done but next time you find yourself in an argument, just think before you speak and really try to take a step back, rather than fighting fire with fire. Retaliating is tempting but it's not so attractive when you realise you've said things you can never take back. 

It's not worth it.


  1. I completely agree with you that it just isn't worth it, there's no point in making something worse when you could easily make it better.
    However, I know I was in a situation a year ago where there was no way of making it better. The person had been my best friend and then turned into a bully, she breathed fire when it came to me and as much as I don't agree with it, I did fight back, because before I cut all ties with her there were some things - not horrible things for the record, just truths about how she'd made me feel - that I had to say.
    Interesting post :) xx

    1. When it really is just a hopeless case that isn't going to get better, you sometimes just have to accept that fighting back is the best option. It can be difficult to stick up for yourself without retaliating too much, and to take a step back without being a doormat. xx

  2. This is very true -- in the heat of the moment it's so easy to just dredge up any resentment/unfounded cruelty that lurks in your head, without thinking through what will happen.

    I really hope everything works out with you and the other person in this case.


    1. I find that, more often than not, you end up saying stuff you really don't mean, just to get back at the person. It sucks.
      Thanks :) xx


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