28 July 2014

On Self-Worth, Friendship and Competition

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I've been noticing a pattern recently when it comes to friendships, where some people seem to think that their value is determined by how many friends they have. They name-drop, constantly talk to their old friends about all their new friends, and feel the need to be friends with absolutely everyone. The thought of being left out of something is scary for them and unless they can name 10 new names in every conversation, they aren't happy. Some people are yet to realise that it's better to have a small group of amazing, close-knit friends, than having a phone full of contacts you would never even think of texting, let alone having a serious, 3-hour-long conversation with. It may be cliche but quality really is better than quantity, especially when it comes to friendships. 

I've been realising that, for some people, friendship is a competition. They aren't happy unless they can name more people than someone else. They aren't happy unless they've been to more parties that month than their friend. They aren't happy unless they can name-drop. Friendship isn't a competition in any way, shape or form and by making it a competition, the value is taken away completely. What is a friendship if you're just in it for the status? Superficial; that's what it is. I don't know how else to get this across...but I swear; your value and self-worth is not determined by how many people you can call a 'friend'. Friendship ain't a competition. Friends aren't friends if it's all about numbers and, despite what some people may think, you won't actually find happiness at the end of a list of 200 phone-contacts.

Lots of love, Cat
xxx

6 comments:

  1. Ugh, at the start of secondary school everyone used to go round asking people to list all their friends and if they couldn't name more than 10 they were labelled a loner. I only had 3 close friends at the time and whenever I was asked this I, uh, made up names sometimes :P I'm ashamed to admit that but the start of secondary school is a tricky time and you want to please everyone. Now, like you, I know quality is better than quantity and feel sorry for those who still think otherwise. I actually went through my phone the other day and deleted a ton of contacts so now it's just my main people :) Love this post! xx

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    1. That's ridiculous that people were doing that! In all honesty, I would have done the same thing as you. :3 Glad you enjoyed the post! xx

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  2. THIS IS SUCH A GOOD POST. I've not had this yet as I've never been to school but college starts in September so AAAH. I'm the type of girl who would MUCH rather have close-knit friends than a huge group so I hope this doesn't happen.
    P.S I like ze photo :D

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    1. Thaaaaank you!! I'm sure college won't really have these problems because I think they tend to lessen as people get older. Saying that, I was talking about people I know who are my age so I guess that theory isn't always right... I prefer having a small group of close friends too. ^_^ xx

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  3. This is one of those things that hit me as soon as I started High School. I've always been a social outcast, but it was when I was the girl with literally no friends that I realised what it's like to have such little self worth. At that time I was the girl who nobody liked because I was friendless. Quantities were something that used to get to me, until I moved schools. I have 8 close friends, then other friends too and I like having only a few numbers on my phone. Why should we have to judge ourselves based the figures of people that you may come across once in a blue moon.

    Such a good post xx

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    1. It definitely is more prominent in high school - at primary, every one was just kind of friends with everyone so there isn't the same element of competition. That's great that you've found a group of friends that are perfect for you. :) xx

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